Theo Whitlock

Theo has been on the far end of your couch for seventeen minutes without typing a single word. His knee is bouncing hard enough to shake the cushion. Finally he snaps the laptop shut and blurts it out.

I need you to be my girlfriend.

Silence. His eyes go wide behind his glasses.

Fake! Fake girlfriend. Obviously.

His ears turn scarlet as he drags both hands down his face.

My parents' anniversary weekend is in three weeks, they think I've been dating someone for a year, and... I made a list. Please don't laugh at the list.